The Beginning of Connie and Isaac (The Blue Butterfly #3) Read online

  I nodded again, mutely answering his command. He held out his hand to me and prompted me to take what he offered me. “Guard it with your life, Connie Swift. As of now, you are no longer mine and you’ll find that your new master is far crueller and vicious than I could ever be.”

  As he walked away, I dropped my eyes to the small photograph in my hand, my sister’s happy smile beaming back at me. The sob that tore from me caused Isaac to turn back. “Good luck, Shadow. Stay safe and use your head.”

  And then the Isaac I had come to know walked away, replaced the very next morning by a cold-hearted bastard that would be the cause of many of my nightmares over the next eighteen months.

  May, 2005. Aged 14.

  ISAAC HAD BEEN silent since he’d picked me up. The drive to the Phantom’s headquarters was the longest and shortest journey of my life. I could feel Isaac’s anguish and that told me that what was coming wouldn’t be as easy as the three previous months. I’d thought Isaac was tough, his regime gruelling and brutal, but I wasn’t naïve enough to think there wasn’t worse to come.

  After roughly an hour’s drive, we pulled up to some huge black iron gates nestled in the middle of a long, high wall. My heart rate shifted into a higher gear and my brow beaded with sweat. The gate opened. Isaac gave me a sad glance and sighed before he carried on up a mile long driveway, the edges surrounded completely by trees, the woodland seeming to go on for miles.

  My eyes widened when a house suddenly came into view, except it wasn’t a house. More like a castle. It was utterly stunning. Four ginormous walls of windows and balconies. Isaac drove straight up to some more massive gates bang in the centre of the facing mile long wall, and just as I thought he was going to drive through them, they opened and he pulled the car slowly into an enormous courtyard.

  Various people milled about and every single pair of eyes moved our way. The square was enclosed within more walls and windows. The beauty of it took my breath away but a shiver slithered through me when my mind told me that looks can be very deceiving. What, on the outside contained beauty, on the inside held nothing but evil and pain. Isaac was testament to that.

  He pulled the car to a stop then climbed out, still silent and brooding. I stared up at him when he opened my door and encouraged me out with a lift of his hand. As I slipped my hand into his, he gulped and gave it a squeeze before the saddest of smiles changed his stern face into an expression of pure agony.

  My heart was beating too fast, making me lightheaded, and my belly twisted so much I thought I was going to vomit on the spotlessly clean slabs gracing my way to wherever Isaac led me.

  We dipped through an archway, my eyes frantically trying to take everything in as he led me farther and farther into the fortress, because that’s exactly what it was; a stronghold to not only keep people out, but also to keep people in.

  We walked along endless long corridors, my footsteps silent on the deep pile carpet that shepherded my way into hell. I knew that was exactly where I was going. I could hear it in the silence of Isaac and the pitying looks from the others.

  We walked into another long hallway, but this time instead of doors lining the stone walls, this one held windows that displayed another small courtyard. My breath stuttered when I caught sight of the large wooden cross in the middle of it. The grass that had covered the previous larger courtyard had now gone and depths of mud and dirt enfolded the sinister crucifix. However, this one didn’t hold Jesus.

  “Isaac,” I whispered, my voice small as my throat closed up.

  He blinked down at me then followed my gaze out of the window. I felt him tense in my hold and I could feel his pulse pumping beneath my fingers. He gulped then carried on, not giving me the soft words of comfort I needed. I stared at him for a moment. Gone was the Isaac I had come to like. His teachings had been rough but he’d also given me privilege to his gentler side on numerous conversations. We would converse easily as we sat roasting rabbits and squirrels around the small fire I would make. Occasionally, he brought alcohol, and more than occasionally, I climbed onto the sheet in the room of the house drunk and giddy. I had enjoyed those moments because they were the things that kept me going. I knew as soon as we entered the Phantom domain that that Isaac had gone for good.

  I noticed the people we passed inclined their heads and nodded respectfully at Isaac. Then I remembered he was the son of the head Phantom. I wondered why he had no say over what happened to me if he held that much value in the family. But I was soon to find out that nobody but Frederik Marinov, dictator of the notorious Phantoms, gave orders. And every soldier carried them through, agreeable or not.

  Finally we walked through a door which took us into a large room. The people that were chatting suddenly halted and turned our way, their expressions eager and excited. The five people that stood rigidly at the edge of the room turned their eyes to me, but I didn’t miss their pitying stares. My body ached under their scrutiny, my heart rampant and giving my blood stream an overload of adrenaline.

  Silence descended instantly and at the very top of the room, a tall man, his hair as black as ebony and his gaze just as dark, turned to me. I could sense his powerful aura shift over me, his supremacy making my skin chill with goosebumps.

  Isaac dropped my hand and dipped his head respectfully. “Father. Shadow.” That was all he said as he backed away and left me standing alone under his father’s study. The man was quiet, his head cocked slightly as his narrow eyes slid slowly up and down me. I gulped when he strode across the gap between us and came to a stop before me. He was tall, very tall, and I had to creak my neck to look up at him.

  I flinched when his thumb and forefinger gently grasped my chin and he turned my face left and right, observing his new soldier, before a sickly smile covered his face. “So you’re the one that cost me so much money.”

  I frowned, unsure of what he was on about. But I remained silent. My skin was prickling with his authority as his touch turned my blood to ice. But Isaac had taught me well and I allowed him to continue.

  “Do you have anything to say about that?”

  For a brief moment I was stunned by his question. Then I swallowed against the dryness in my mouth. “I apologise, sir. I’m aware that I am gifted to you in exchange for my sister’s life and for that I show my eternal gratitude.”

  He smirked, his head tipping back as he laughed – at me. But he pursed his lips and nodded. “Your eternal gratitude, huh?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Well then, Shadow, let’s see how far that appreciation stretches.”

  I gasped and squealed when he yanked my hair and pulled me across the room. One of the girls standing at the edge of the room winced and dropped her gaze from mine as I looked at her through the blur of my wet eyes. My hand instinctively lifted to his grasp in my hair but as I touched his skin he tightened his hold on me, the pain making my knees buckle until I dropped to the floor. But he continued moving swiftly, dragging me on my knees to a table in the corner.

  Manoeuvring me, he slammed my forehead down on the table so I was bent over, and when he pulled my leggings down, I cried out and shook my head. “Please don’t!” I sobbed. “Please don’t!”

  “Father!” I heard Isaac’s stern voice behind us. “She’s fourteen. She’s a child!”

  “She is no longer a child, Isaac,” Frederik roared back. “She is mine to do with as I wish, fourteen or forty. And I’ll demand that you keep your petty whining quiet.”

  I could hear the hush in the room but I felt Frederik’s hand tremble when my bare backside was presented to him. He paused, dragging air through his teeth until the hiss made me shiver. His hand touched the skin of my buttock and a choked sob tore from me.

  I gritted my teeth, waiting for it, but when it didn’t come I turned to look over my shoulder at Frederik. His gaze held so much hatred and disgust that I couldn’t look away. I was caught in the play of his mind, his sick desire racing across his face.

  However, he stepped back,
his lip curled, before he turned and barked to someone, “Strip her and take her out.” I tensed when I felt hands take hold of my arms and pull me up. “Let’s see what you’re made of, little girl.”

  I was dragged back, my feet not touching the floor as two men pulled me through a door and in to the courtyard with the cross I’d seen through the window, sending my terror to a new level. “Oh, God, no!”

  They pulled me upright, and through the stream of my tears I saw Isaac leaning on a wall, watching the horror unfold. His eyes found mine, and witnessing my despair, he faintly shook his head at me, telling me in no uncertain terms to suck it up. “Breathe,” he mouthed to me. His lesson of breathing through pain seeped into my head and I swallowed back the anguish as I did as he asked and concentrated on filling my lungs to fuel my brain.

  I was stripped, my clothes torn from me as one of the men leered at my nudeness. “Shit, it’s a shame you’re gonna be sore for a while. I’d love to initiate you properly.”

  “Joel!” Isaac growled. But Joel just laughed and squeezed my boob, giving me a wink when I trembled beneath his rough touch.

  Once again, I looked at Isaac. His eyes were low, his gaze on my naked body, but when he lifted them to my face, he winced and turned around then walked away, leaving me with the sick bastards who couldn’t help but grope me as they tied me to the wooden cross. I was thankful that they tied both of my ankles together on the bottom, closing my thighs to their wandering hands. My face squashed against the roughness of the wood as my bare backside was shown to everyone in the small yard. Humiliation reddened my face and I squeezed my eyes closed against it. But then, when an excruciating pain tore through my back, they flung open with the force of the scream that burst from me. Another agonising pain sliced through me as Frederik brought the whip back down, his strength scraping my skin from me in the single lash. The scream that left me again made the girl I had seen inside wince for me. My eyes rested on her. She found my gaze with her own and the sorrow on her face held me hostage. When another torrent of lashes belted my back and I couldn’t scream for the choked sobs that were suffocating me, the girl mouthed, “Breathe, Shadow.” Her chest heaved as though showing me. Isaac’s training came to me, and I gritted my teeth but sucked a hefty gulp of air through them, the tremble in my jaw making it difficult. Then when the girl slumped her shoulders, I blew it out noisily. Her chest lifted again, encouraging me, before they dropped and we both blew out together. It didn’t stop the pain, but as the torture continued I breathed in and out with the tiny blond girl, her support the only thing that got me through the hour of a torment so unimaginable, my mind zoned out and my brain concentrated on nothing but my breathing and the girl’s face.

  Eventually, when I passed out, the final thing I saw was her slight nod of her head, urging me to give into the unconscious. And I did it eagerly.

  THE BRUTAL AGONY crippling my body forced my eyes open as a choked sob surged up my throat with the vomit.

  “It’s okay, Shadow. Let it out.”

  I could barely move but hands directed me over the side of a bed so the flow of sick was guided into a waiting bucket.

  “That’s it, sister. Let it out.” I blinked and frowned at her strange address. I was not her sister. The tiny blonde girl who had supported me through the worst lesson of my life smiled softly. “Bullet,” she said.

  I couldn’t answer her for the torrent of abuse my stomach was under, the pain bringing forth a raging illness. My head was sweaty and hot but the rest of my body shivered with a chill. My whole body ached even though it was only my back and backside that had been the focus of Frederik’s cruelty.

  “And this is Mouse,” she added when my gaze swung to the curvy, dark-haired girl sitting on a chair beside my bed. She smiled at me but remained silent.

  I gasped when I saw the tube stuck into her arm, her own blood flowing through it and into a drip bag where it then continued its journey through another tube directly into my arm. “What the..?” I spluttered around another round of retches.

  “Sshhh,” Bullet soothed. “You needed blood fast. You’ll get to understand our ways.”

  I decided to question her about it later. I was amazed and grateful for their compassion and aid but I also wondered why someone hadn’t phoned for an ambulance instead. Then I remembered where I was. However, the small square room was new and I blinked at Bullet as I rolled back onto the bed, hissing at the pain in my back before I rolled back onto my side. “Where am I?”

  “This is your room, Shadow.” She gave me a sad but tender smile. “You’re allowed to decorate it as you wish.” Her eyes widened and she dragged something from her pocket. “Which reminds me.” She handed me the photo of Mae. “This was in the lining of your coat. You were lucky. Just as I was about to incinerate it I caught it sticking out where they’d ripped your clothes.”

  I snatched it to my chest then smiled at her when I realised how rude I was being. “Thank you.”

  She nodded and stood up, checking the bag full of blood. “Make sure you hide it from the sentinels. Those bastards will burn it before your very eyes.”

  My heart sank as everything came back to me.

  “I don’t think Master likes you,” Bullet said with a small laugh as she pulled the needle from Mouse’s arm but left me attached to what was left in the bag. “I heard you’d pissed him off before you even got here. Isaac…” She frowned as she studied me. “Isaac went against his own father for you. Are you two fucking?”

  My jaw dropped and I spluttered on my own response. “No!”

  She shrugged casually. “Shouldn’t be long before you are.”

  I stared at her with incredulity. What the hell was she on? “I don’t think so.”

  She smirked then shook her head. “Anyway.” She smiled as she wrapped her arms around me. “We need to get you up and moving before your wounds set awkwardly.”

  I cried out when she managed to get me into a sitting position. Mouse appeared with some pills and a glass of water. I smiled up at her. “Thank you.” She nodded and smiled in return.

  “She can’t talk,” Bullet said as she gave Mouse a tender touch of the cheek. Her pet name now made sense; quiet as a mouse. Weirdly, Mouse leaned into Bullet’s touch intimately. “Frederik cut out her tongue.”

  My mouth fell open in shock. “Oh my God.”

  Bullet shrugged. “Don’t be shocked, Shadow. Soon, nothing that happens here will shock you anymore.” She unhooked me from the drip then dragged my legs off the bed and placed my feet onto the floor as I still stared at Mouse. “Come on,” she said firmly. “We need to get you training for your initiation if you’re to stand a chance. West need you.”

  “West?”

  She nodded but walked behind me and started to dress my wounds. “Us. West.”

  “I don’t understand.” I hissed as she poured a solution down my tender back, but gritted my teeth against the need to cry.

  “The Phantom soldiers are split into two groups,” she informed me. “The east side of the castle is the East’s domain, and they have Joel as their leader. And we take up the west wing. Isaac is our commander.”

  “If I make it?”

  She nodded. “You initiation is in three weeks so we need to get you ready. West needs you. East have eight and we’re now down to six.” Mouse winced and dropped her eyes to the floor before she held out some clothes.

  I smiled again as I took them from her but when my gaze dropped to the items in my hands, I spluttered. “I can’t wear these!” It was then that I realised Bullet and Mouse wore the exact same items of clothing. The black leather leggings and tight black leather top made my heart beat quicker.

  “Why?”

  “Well they’re… they’re leather – and tight.”

  Mouse rolled her eyes then waved a hand over the front of her body, showing me that she also wore it, and maybe it didn’t look so bad.

  “It’s either wear what they give us or walk around naked. And let me tell y
ou, it’s fucking hard enough keeping the sentinels’ hands away from you as it is.” Bullet sighed and moved around to the front of me, kneeling down and looking up at me with pity. “Shadow, your old life is exactly that. Old. Now you need to adjust if you stand any chance of surviving, and you need to do it quickly, sister.”

  I stared at her then swallowed. “My initiation?”

  “That will be announced during supper,” she said as she helped me into the clothes, my body twitching in pain as the material grazed over the burning welts. “It’s always Master’s instruction but you will go up against the new East probationer.”

  My mouth dried as I slipped my arm through the armholes in the t-shirt. “And what is usual for initiations?”

  Bullet shrugged as she dragged a brush through my long black matted hair and tied it in a bunch behind my head. “Sometimes it’s a simple fight. Sometimes it’s a ‘who shoots who first’…” My eyes widened more and more at her revelations. “…and sometimes it’s a case of who wants to go to hell first.”

  My heart rate was going crazy, my blood chilling when I started to understand what she meant. “Am I expected to…?”

  “Kill?” She finished for me when I couldn’t say the word. I nodded. “Yep.”

  That was all she said as she took my hand and led me from the room.

  We emerged in a huge room after twenty minutes walking through the castle into the south quarter. Long wooden tables topped with cutlery and condiments were lined up side by side, some of the seats taken and some empty. A large table ran horizontal to the others along the top of the room and my eyes found Isaac’s where he sat beside his father at the centre of it. An expression I hadn’t seen in him before covered his face when his eyes slowly dragged down the length of me. His lips parted and his tongue came out to wet his lips. I shivered. I’d seen lust before but never really in Isaac’s expressions. I’d caught him looking at me from time to time, but the way he looked at me now was completely different, apart from when he had observed me naked on the cross.